It is always interesting to listen to children bicker and quarrel amongst themsleves. It doesn’t matter why it was started. The arguements and logic they bring to the table can tend to be hilarious.

Most times the means by which they fight have little importance but sometimes it is great to listen in, pay attention to, and try to teach some important life lessons.

One of the tendencies of human nature is to always use any and everything available to us to defend ourselves. It is so old and normal that it shouldn’t surprise me when it happens but it seems to be over the top some times.

The tactics I want to talk about should be corrected if we expect our children to function properly in the world.

First is the blame game. We have all seen it and we have probably all done it at somepoint in our lives. We get in trouble for x or y and we immediately blame someone else. Sometimes the blame does belong to someone else, but not always.

Many pass the blame before we even try to explain. We have come to realize that shifting blames diverts all questioning of myself. I am free of guilt and will likely not be tried again. (Double jeopardy isn’t applicable with teenagers.)

However when we shift blame we aren’t being held responsible for our actions. We are throwing someone else under the bus and letting them receive the punishment I deserve.

I get it. I understand that none of us want to pay for our crimes but until we pay for those crimes it cant become a lesson we have learned. Learning is essential in the lives of our children. We must guarantee their success. One of the simplest ways is to let them pay the price.

It can’t always be someone else’s fault.

A friend of mine years ago said that the hardest thing in parenting is letting your kids fall flat on their face, knowing that they’re going to get hurt.

Let’s teach our kids to man up and say, “Yes, I did it. I am sorry and it won’t happen again.”

Only then can we get them out from underneath the bus and get them headed in the right direction.